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  “Where am I going to find her?” I realized that Emilie wouldn’t be exactly walking around with a tracking device on her. Where would I even begin to look for her? What side? What era? What respectable little NOLA dive would she be hiding out at?

  Ghede Massaka laughed as I continued to ponder all of the many places Emilie would be hiding out at. He finally ended my self-inflicted torture. “Oh please! You fool! She’s waiting for you. You don’t have to go anywhere. She’ll find you, of that you can be certain,” he said cryptically.

  Of course she would come to me, but in what form? I didn’t even want to think about Edmond. The very thought of him prompted my body to freeze. I could still smell his musky Parisian cologne, feel his perfectly manicured fingers on my skin, and taste his bandy-scented lips on mine. It was one aspect of my past that I hadn’t gotten over and maybe I never would. The only thing I could do was admit that a part of me would always remain broken, but that didn’t have to stop me from having a better tomorrow. My past was my past, but it wouldn’t be my future. I had already decided that my future would be triumphant, bright, hopeful, and an example, rather than a tragic statistic of wasted potential. Despite the twisted mess I was in I had faith and nothing was permanently keeping me down.

  “So?” Ghede Massaka interrupted my moment of self-affirmation. He impatiently tapped his long, claw like nails against a nearby tomb. “I have eternity, but you don’t!”

  “Let me see your eyes,” I said out of absolutely nowhere. “I want you to look me in the eyes and give me your word. It’s easy to hide behind a veil of anonymity, but to look me in the eyes and repeat your promise is a whole other story.” He reminded me of those internet trolls that spewed their hatred, while sitting behind the comfort of their keyboards disregarding the feelings and humanity of their target. Cowards. Bullies. I would not bend or bow to bullies. Sadly, Ghede Massaka was not too pleased with my new found courage.

  “What did you say?” he shrieked, as he threw his rum bottle to the ground. I watched as it cracked into a thousand minuscule pieces.

  Someone had major anger issues. I held my breath. The graveyard became deadly silent as the group ceased their strange hymn. “Show me your eyes.”

  “SING!” he ordered. “SING YOU USELESS FOOLS!” he hollered, as he picked up pieces of glass and threw them at the group. Immediately, Linto, Marie, and Sabrina recommenced their chant.

  I didn't come here to be anyone's servant

  Digging the hole; it's me. Burying; it's me (bis)

  I didn't come here to be anyone's servant.

  “You want to see my eyes, do you?” he asked, as he walked towards me in a slinky snakelike manner. I noticed that he still had his veil firmly in place. He obviously didn’t care about eye contact and other proper social etiquette that we humans craved.

  “Yes.”

  He slithered closer and closer until the only thing separating my mouth from his was the thin lace veil. Before I had a chance to step backwards, I felt the porous material of the veil press against my lips. His toxic breath flooded my mouth and sucked all of my saliva dry. Limp and utterly drained of life, my tongue hung out of my mouth and my knees wobbled as I tumbled to the earth. Streams of green vomit dribbled out of my mouth in a steady flow and onto the black earth next to me.

  “I make the rules! Not you,” said Ghede Massaka, as he stood over me. I felt his pointy heel dig deep into my rib. A flashback of Cecile’s death came to me again. I was her once again, down on my knees with a shoe in my ribs. No. This time it would be different. I had to be different. I had a right to decide my own destiny. Everyone had a right to decide their own destiny. Of course, this was easier said than done. Paralyzed by the poison that was in me, I felt my spirit start to slip out of my body. Above me, I heard Ghede Massaka laugh ruthlessly as he continued to stick his pointy shoe into my rib.

  “I want HER NOW!” he ordered. “But that doesn’t mean I can't have a little bit of fun with you first… After all, death is a party. My party!”

  Sweaty, confused, unable to breathe or tell him off, I was on the verge of succumbing to the poison. Dark shadows wickedly danced around me, seductively whispering my name. “Arelia. Arelia. Come have a little fun…. Just for a while. All of this confusion and responsibility, who needs it?” they hissed. The voices were soft and soothing as silk and freshly melted chocolate. Ashamed of myself for finding their words tempting I tried to shut out their voices completely, and begged for some kind of divine intervention. I knew I couldn’t trust the shadows of the dark. That never worked out for the best. I tried hard to fight them, but despite all of my rage and determination, I felt my spirit being pulled closer and closer to the dark voices…

  Chapter Eight

  The Child Who liveth in Darkness has seen the Great Light

  Somewhere on the Other side

  Present Day

  I fell into a pit so deep, so depressing, so utterly devoid of hope, that I couldn’t imagine a time or place when I had been happy or hopeful. The glitz and gothic glamour of the cemetery faded into oblivion. I found myself in a gray valley full of bones, ashes, and dark shadows with fang-like teeth. The air was hot, ashy, and toxic. It smelt like I would have imagined the inside of Ghede Massaka’s fleshy sack to smell. No trees, no music, no gyrating skeletons, no monster moon or a pitiful group of gravediggers, only a gray somber emptiness that stretched on and on.

  I gasped for air, but it was pointless as the air was as toxic as the poison that pumped through my veins. In the distance I heard the greedy croak of a crow. The stench of decomposing flesh danced with the toxins making it lethal to whiff an ounce of air.

  “As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil…” I mumbled in an attempt to convince myself that I would be okay.

  Oh, who was I kidding? I was mortified. So, this is how it would end? Maybe Marie was right. How many rivers did we have to cross before we could speak to the boss? At that moment all that I had gained it seemed I had lost.

  “Stay,” whispered the dark shadows that surrounded me. They linked hands and danced around me in a strange, march-like trance.

  “Yes,” I muttered. I began to breathe in the toxic air. It didn’t smell that bad anymore. Funny… the things you get used to when you believe you have no other options. I stretched out my hand, reaching for the shadow when a voice stopped me.

  “NO!” I heard Ghede Linto’s voice yell from somewhere beyond. “NO! Go to the gate!” he hollered. “Arelia, the gate. Ask him for help. You know he won’t let you down. Can you hear his guitar? He’s waiting for you. You’re ready,” he said bravely.

  “No,” I muttered, as the shadows crept closer and closer. Their wicked smiles stretched wide like those of Cheshire cats.

  “YES!”

  Linto’s voice forced me back into consciousness. I found myself back in the graveyard with Ghede Massaka standing over me.

  “Linto!” Ghede Massaka removed his shoe from my rib and turned his attention to the child spirit. Brave little Linto had managed to rise despite the gooferdust that had crippled him earlier.

  “I can’t,” I muttered. I despised myself for being so weak and helpless. Wasn’t I supposed to be stronger?

  “You can do this, Arelia! I know you can. You have to. You’re not weak like me. I need you to do this for me and everyone like me. Please. Wake up! Don’t let him bully you! I know you’ll win in the end. Whatever he has in store for you doesn’t matter. I know you’ll survive because you’re the head cornerstone. The stone that the builder refuse will always be the head cornerstone. Make me proud Arelia and one day I’ll make you proud. You’re my hero.”

  What most people don’t know or refuse to acknowledge is that words carry a vast amount of power. They have the ability to create, destroy, build up, or tear down. The stone that the builder refuse will always be the head cornerstone. Make me proud Arelia and one day I’ll make you proud.

  Ghede Linto’s words built me up tenfold
. They flushed the poison out of my system and forced me to stand up tall, even though I was still dizzy and a bit cross-eyed. Wasting no time, I ran towards the wrought iron cemetery gate. It was firmly closed, but I knew exactly who would help me break it open. I shoved my limp tongue back into my mouth and wiped away the green vomit from my lips. Quickly, before Ghede Massaka had a chance to touch me again or notice that I was regaining my strength, I recited a chant:

  Papa Legba, please help your children at the gateway

  Papa Legba, open the door

  Your children await

  Open the door Papa Legba

  So that I may pass

  When I return, I will thank the loa.

  “Come on…” I muttered under my breath. I shook the iron gate. It was cool and refreshing to the touch, but unfortunately firmly stuck in place. Sensing Ghede Massaka creeping up behind me, I recited the chant once again:

  Papa Legba, please help your children at the gateway

  Papa Legba, open the door

  Your children await

  Open the door Papa Legba

  So that I may pass

  When I return, I will thank the loa.

  To my horror, the gate remained firmly shut and the guitar music that indicated Papa Legba was near had started to fade.

  “Damn!” I shouted. “Please Papa Legba. I don’t have any candy or cigars with me at this very second, but as soon as I get my hands on some, I’ll make a huge offering in your honor. There will be plenty of red and black candles and spicy rum too. I swear,” I added desperately. “And, I’ll make sure to include smoked chicken, goat, sweet potatoes, white yams, and bananas. I won’t forget your two cups of black coffee. One will be made strong with no sugar and the second cup will be made strong and black with lots of sugar.” I felt my confidence build up again as I proudly remembered all of Papa Legba’s favorite offerings.

  Slowly, the sky beyond the gate turned a brilliant shade of blood red and the moon above me turned black as coal. In the distance, under a glorious oak sat the rock star of the spirit world. Dressed in his tattered straw hat and black and red plaid shirt, Papa Legba appeared to be a humble peasant, rather than one of the most powerful loas of all time. His wrinkled old face with its snow white beard was serene and his large kindly brown eyes gleamed under the pale moonlight.

  He calmly played his guitar and sang a little tune:

  Everybody say she got a mojo

  Now, she's been using' that stuff

  Mmm mmm mmm, 'everybody says she got a mojo

  'Cause she been using' that stuff

  But she got a way trimmin' down

  hoo, fair brown, and I mean it's most too tough

  It was so soothing and utterly seductive, that I could almost taste one of those Lindor Lindt chocolates melt in my mouth and slide down my throat and into my belly. His modest nature and kind energy nourished me and as much as I could have stood there all night and listened to him play and sing, I knew my time was up.

  Ghede Massaka’s footsteps were coming closer and closer. There was a heaviness in the air. The stench of his sack grew stronger. My heart beat faster.

  “Please. Please. Anything.” Dejected, I was on the verge of tears as I furiously shook the gate.

  Apparently, Papa Legba found my demented state amusing. He let out a hardy laugh and took a long drag from his pipe.

  When he finally spoke, his words were cryptic at best. “Oh little darling, why do you look so sad and forsaken? Don’t you know when one gate is closed another is always open?”

  “Yes, I know, but right now I need this gate open,” I said, as I shook the iron gate in hopes that he would get on with it already.

  “Little darling, Papa Legba doesn’t want your offering of candy or cigars. Nor does he want some of that mighty fine sounding coffee or some of that smoked chicken. Maybe a banana or two.” He chuckled.

  “Banana?” I was painfully aware of the fact that there was no way in hell I would be able to find a banana in this cemetery.

  Papa Legba let out a another hearty laugh as he examined my worried face.

  “I’m only playing with you little darling. Spirits like to play too you know.”

  “Yes, I’m more than aware of that little fact,” I said a little annoyed at how much fun he was having at my expense. I glanced behind me and was horrified to see that Ghede Massaka was a mere foot or two away from me. “What is it that you require of me?”

  “Oh, that,” he said casually as if he had forgotten how desperate for help I was. “No food or candy for me tonight. On a night like this Papa Legba needs to make sure you’re really worthy of his help. So, my question is, little darling, are you worthy or do you need to head back to my bar?”

  Oh Dieu, I never wanted to go back to that horrible place again. I thought back to that dank place full of people who refused to look in the mirror. Full of people who refused to acknowledge their own faults, flaws, and chose to live in denial. I had spent countless years in that place. I had spent so much time being caught up in my own mental slavery. “I want to be free,” I said quickly. I felt Ghede Massaka’s hands slip around my sweaty neck. I knew it was time to be brutally honest. “I don’t want to live in the darkness anymore. You said that you couldn’t offer clarity to those who walk in the dark. Well, I don’t want to be one of those people. I want to free my friends. I want to free Lucus and Louis but above all, I want to free myself.”

  Ghede Massaka’s grip tightened. His body shook with laughter. “Good luck with that,” he snarled and laughed that bone-chilling laugh of his. “Good luck with that!!!! I don’t have any faith in you!!!!! Ha ha ha ha ha! I’m not done having my fun yet and when I am done, well, you still have to carry out your little task or your friends are DOOMED!”

  At that instance, I realized that Ghede Massaka was a downpressor. For whatever reason, no matter what, he had nothing positive to say. I couldn’t change him, but I could change my reaction to his viciousness by not giving him the satisfaction he craved. His grip got tighter and tighter until my eyes started to water and bulge.

  Papa Legba laughed and started to play his guitar and sing

  The child who liveth in Darkness has seen the great light

  Lord, she’s got to keep on moving

  Lord, she’s got to keep on moving

  Lord, she’s got to keep on moving

  Papa Legba’s music encompassed me and the pain seemed to vanish regardless of how tight Ghede Massaka’s grip became. My eyes closed and I drifted far, far away.

  Chapter Nine

  Down in the River to Pray

  Present Day

  Darkwood Plantation

  When my eyes opened, I found myself ankle deep in murky swamp water. Mist lay thick over the water and long beard like Spanish moss hung off of massive cypress trees that danced around me. Above, the moon was clear and pale while the stars were tiny but incredibly radiant. For a split second I was sorry that I didn’t have a camera with me. The moment was the stuff of picturesque postcards and romantic magnolia scented nights, which captured the imagination of so many. Alas, the magnolia fantasy was quickly replaced with harsh reality as a throng of mosquitoes decided to swerve around my head and feast on my mud-covered skin. Was this Darkwood swamp? I didn’t care where it was, as long as it was far away from Ghede Masska.

  “Merci! Papa Legba! Merci! I have no idea where I am, but thank you!” I twirled around and around like a giddy school girl. The stench and decay of the swamp smelled delicious in comparison to where I had just come from. My joy was cut short was I remembered that Sabrina and Marie were still in that graveyard digging graves. I let out a little sigh and remembered Papa Legba’s song , “Lord, she’s got to keep on moving.”

  I navigated the lush swamp and noticed that even though it looked an awful like Darwood swamp, there something different about it. Something I couldn’t quite place my finger on. As I swatted away the pests, unease crept into my weary bones. It took me a few seconds to realize
that the usual hum and soothing night sonata of the creatures that inhabited the area was missing. I listened for the familiar hiss of a snake or comforting wild cry of a wolf, but there was nothing but a threatening silence. Even the mosquitoes that circled above my head were strangely quiet, as they went about their mission to torment me.

  For no rational reason at all, I stopped walking and just stood there. My body started to shake and my dirty hands started to tremble. I was pretty sure it was one those post traumatic stress episodes I had anticipated. Suddenly, the task at hand felt so enormous. It seemed so much bigger than me. But that wasn’t why I reverted to panic mode. I didn’t know how I would be able to face Lucus and Louis. I vowed to keep my promise to Ti Jean and keep my mouth shut, but I knew that the truth would eventually come out. The truth always had a way of coming out. It was something that couldn’t be suppressed no matter how hard we tried. And when it did… I… I… All that I had gained would be lost. Lucus would no longer be mine.

  My knees started to shake and my weary legs trembled until they gave out. I found myself kneeling in filthy swamp water. I secretly hoped a wild beast would come along and devour me. I didn’t feel like a Queen. “It’s okay. Shh. Everything is going to be alright,” I whispered, as I wrapped my arms around my torso and rocked back and forth. “The child who liveth in darkness has seen the great light. Lord, she’s got to keep on moving,” I repeated Papa Lebga’s words, as I continued to rock back and forth. Between my thin, dry sobs I almost started to laugh at myself. I was such a cliché. One of those demented swamp Voodoo Queens you read about in haunted New Orleans tour books. I half expected a group of tourists to pop up from behind the cypress trees and take my picture.

  I knew that I couldn’t think about myself at a time like this, yet I was paralyzed by my own insecurities and fears. That vision I had seen of Lucus in the graveyard was horrifying. I had tasted his utter hatred and disgust for me. Even though it has only been a part of my delusion, I was still afraid because even the strangest delusion had some truth to it.